HASH GODS FART TOWARDS GZH3
Every now and then a surreal thing happens at Hash, in my opinion each hash club experiences this. Our 900th experienced that which cannot be named because it chooses not to be named for it “is” for a lack of a better word: ABSOLUTE PERFECTION. Eh, two words! The Gods of Hash shone brightly their great... big... Pimple free... Full Moons at GZH3 and blessed us all with their mighty wind, showing us the best possible run and the way towards to amber nectar at run end.

Spiders from Mars.
On Sat morning while most of you where busy performing various types of deviant sexual behavior, the Hares where already out at run site thrashing, climbing and trail blazing fearlessly through huge swaths of spider webs, and sleeping nests of yellow wasps, most of these we took down, but some of them we crept under, thus saving the webs for the taller higher center of gravity runners to go face first into. Cough Cough Caveman! That we truly hoped would end up with a big six incher in his mouth... hahaha!

Shekou Hash Re- Education Hash
Months before the 900th, Hash mismanagement under intense pressure from those that went to Shekou cried for “payback” Our main purpose though for inviting Shekou besides getting some form of payback was to rescue their young ladies from such a boring hash house, as well as get them to buy tons of our fantastic merchandise and generally show off to them the general lack of discipline our hash was and is.

Total runner count # 74.

With Ice cold buckets of Beers both hashes boarded their buses and on on to the run site.

HORNY V
At the start of the RUN it was obvious that our latest reject from East Block was showing off to the ladies and men alike his blowing skills, obviously trying to impress our GZH3 MIMANAGEMENT that he would become HORN BLOWER. We have made the right decision since then.

Honey Melons
Appears out of nowhere. Despite a tiff between shoeless ho and honey melons early that morning on best possible position, honey melons had somehow boarded the bus and surprised the shit out of him, once he saw her. Cool.

Mr. Clean, Dick Magnet
Were overly serious about running by stretching before hand and narrowly missed a down down at circle time; for overly athletic prowess;  however some say they where just  showing off their butts to the shekou woman as the GZ women these days are all experimenting with other flavors, such as carpet munching is currently the latest fad.. I hear...
Caveman
Either the beer in shanghai sucks, or Caveman just keeps flying back to GZH3 hash cause it is the best anywhere and besides it’s the only place on the planet his massive nipples get recognized. As usual his nipples could be seen twitching excitedly at Pre Run time. (I heard)

Confusion reins.
Like all good hashes confusions must reign at the beginning of all runs. As this being the best run ever, all 74 hashers took all the wrong trails first,

Dookie Delicious
One notable hashers just missed putting his foot into a Dookie landmine proudly squeezed out by shoeless that very morning. But alas that Frenchman was just too quick. Sometimes it is not to be. C’e st La Vie.

First Massive False Trail 90% Dimwits fall for it.

There is something sweet when over 90% of the runners fall for all the false trails at run start but the experience of watching 69 runners go up the first big massive false trail ( this one laid by Soggy Biscuit) really is close to a hashorgasm (urban dictionary). Beautiful. Dick Magnets thirst for beer or his acute sense of hashing direction gave him the lead at run start. The rest like sheep, looking beaten already started to follow the cries of ON ON way way ahead…

Shekou Polluting biatches
Even though Shekou did pay for it at circle time it was surprising to find that in 2007 Shekou disrespecting our HASH Site by leaving empty plastic bottles and cans along the run. It pained us to see this as I am sure it did the locals.  Perhaps next time a more environmentally responsible Shekou will be seen.

The run took both walkers and runner through all kinds of great terrain.  Sadly No one was bitten by dogs or got bird flu from the myriad of bird catch nets found at the top of the LAST hill. All 74 managed to get to the B site without too much trouble due to the fantastic markings laid down by all the Hares involved.

 
Circle Up.
Circle started up with shoeless walking into the the circle throwing what was left of the flour into the air, a split second later Shekou’s watery response started. Left out in the open shoeless called in his troops to unleash ICE COLD volleys of water from our vessels.

It was game over in 25 seconds with much of shekou left shivering. Circle pace going and shoeless proudly handed the circle to RA SOGGY BISCUIT. Soggy Biscuit handled with supreme skill 74 hungry and thirsty hashers unleashing a tirade of fines, ice time for shekou, down downs. Everyone had a great time. At the end Aussie Hong was at last given the responsibility of carrying a hash name –PIN HEAD which he is now known as.

Circle was closed a little early due to the lack of a light source to illuminate the circle and more importantly the sweet smell of freshly roasted mountain chicken.

All in all a great day for all and on behalf of HASH MISMANAGEMENT we’d like to thank ALL of you for cumming on the 900th and making it, what could be; the best ever hash.

Hares:
Soggy Biscuit, Mi Lau Su, Shoeless Ho,
Trackers: Finger Licker and Thumble Prints

AND NOW THIS FROM SHEKOU HASH , FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER.
WE ARE ALLOWING AN OUT SIDER TO WRITE THEIR OWN HASH TRASH
FROM: YMCA of Shekou .
The Shekou Hash heads to Guangzhou for the GZH3 #900 Run!  Feeling bad for getting you lost when you came here, so we brought cash and bought a bunch of your yellow #888 shirts that you couldn't get rid of because the ink bleeds.  But learning from your mistake, our bus had air conditioning, beer, snacks and women, while the Guangzhou bus down to Shenzhen had none of those. Newly named "Cums in Taxis" (Drew) came on the bus...so we made him clean it up. 

Louisa tried to make him look better by braiding his hair while he slept...the guys must have liked it because they all said "do me! do me next!".  We had a Japanese virgin named Nora cum also- but she thinks she is Chinese.  7/11 drank the whole way up to Guangzhou, and then puked before the run; most of us puke afterwards but why not be different?   Beer Babooshka tried unsuccessfully to molest nearly all the woman on the Shekou Hash, but soon gave up and turned to the Guangzhou women.  7/11 was a good sport and got up and ran like hell, until he got sick again. 

------------------------BEFORE------------------------------------- AFTER----------------------------

Titty Teaser, Cathy, former Shekou Hasher turned Guangzhou recruitment queen, showed up and tried to deny her name!  We called point of order and got her on the ice for that, and she being the obedient wench that she is decided she liked the ice and sat there for 6 down downs.  She thinks Guangzhou will forget, but they won't right? IT'S: TITTY TEASER. 

Guangzhou has a thing for unmarrieds- YMCA was asked multiple times where his wife is, however while she is soon to be she is yet to be...and Free Willy Two was pronounced husband of Slippery When Wet..."she's not my wife", he proclaimed, to no avail.  However Bongkang found his future ex-wife in the Guangzhou Hash, Fiona, and she was found amidst the Shekou crowd the following week on our run #1188, walking with Bongkang.   BBC and Drew (soon to be named Cums in Taxis) were found wearing identical black and white Hash uniforms which brought up fidelity issues with BBC's wife, Juicy Jugs.  

Miss Popular ever the popular girl was confused, and didn't believe the funny rounded arrow with two circular things on the bottom was a picture of a dick.  And finally, everyone had fun when Shekou caught Guangzhou by surprise by pulling squirt guns out of our pants.  They thought it was good fun until we told them we filled them with piss on the bus ride up...or did we?

On On and thank you Guangzhou H3 for one heck of a #900 party!

More Pics

First and Last Time Hashers Jeffery and Sally

Awesome hair!

Smiles

More Smiles

Even more Smiles

Even more smiles!!!

Thats all folks

Upcoming Hashes:

FULL MOON – SEPT 26TH  Hares: GLOBE TWATTER & SIR CUM NAVIGATOR.

DYI YANGSHOU HASH NOV 17- 18th
www.gzh3.com !!! For exciting pictures nd news!!
Send your hash related pictures to gzhash@gmail.com